I come to you with a heavy heart and a tear stained pillow. Today I had to watch my soldier walk away, knowing that I couldn't go with him. Knowing that he was headed to unsafe places and I am not allowed to wipe the sweat off his forehead and rub his head until he falls asleep. Knowing that his side of the bed is going to be cold for an entire year. Knowing that when I cook, I'm now only cooking for 1 person. Knowing that when I have a tough day at work, his arms will not be at home to greet me, or vice versa. We are going to be spending birthdays, holidays, special events, and weekend snuggles, separated. God, I know that you have a plan for me, for him, for us. Whatever that plan is, I hope him and I will be together again one day soon. You brought him into my life for a reason. I've savored every kiss, every hug, every weekend snuggle, knowing that this was coming. I'm prepared and ready, but I still am going to need your help. I'm going to need a comforting hand at night time when I'm at my loneliest. I'm going to need friends and family that can keep me busy and my mind off our separation. I'm going to need confidence in myself that I can do this, confidence in him that he will come home to me, and confidence in you when I'm having a hard time with all of it. God, please make sure he feels my love every day when he thinks about me and misses me. Make sure he feels my comfort when he is lonely or tired. Make sure that he knows I will be here waiting when he gets finished, just like I promised. Please help this time apart make us stronger as individuals and as a couple.
My heart is heavy and feels unbearable right now. I know that you say to enjoy life and savor every moment, but if this next year flew by, I wouldn't be upset. Please just bring my soldier back home to me. Amen.
No comments:
Post a Comment