We are three weeks out from deployment and I can feel his mood changing. Last night was the first time I have ever gone to sleep wishing I could change all this for him. First time ever his arms weren't wrapped around me as we went to sleep. He's stressed and I'm helpless.
I can't even imagine how hard it must be to see your girlfriend upset and trying to cope with your leaving. To see your friends upset that the routines they have established with you are going to change. To feel awkward when they want to throw a surprise going away party because you aren't used to people caring that you're leaving. To know that as you pack, you're packing everything because you aren't returning to this apartment. You are leaving everything you love for an entire year and you have to stand strong as those that love you are struggling for more time. I can't even imagine what that feels like.
I wish I could take all this pain from him. I wish I could fast forward a year and welcome him home back into my arms and back into his life.
Hopefully his arms will be more willing to snuggle before bed and just maybe his heart won't be so heavy tonight.
Lord please give me the words to say to comfort him when he is stressed. Give me the knowledge to know when to leave him alone and when to hold him. Please help me choke back the tears because that's one thing he shouldn't have to see as he deals with his own emotions deployment. Amen.
No comments:
Post a Comment